A kid raising kids...

Stronger Marriage Day #21 - Loose Ends (Final Day)

2012-02-14T09:55:00.001-06:00

Most married couples begin marriage with an "us against them" mentality. The wedding day marks the moment a husband and wife realize there is going to be a whole lot more pouring into the marriage than just what the couple brings. Life begins to pour so many other variables into the mix, and couples can lose their way from enjoying marriage and life because they did not stop to consider the totality of their lives. These variables are pretty vast, but they can include...

Financial situations
Kids
Traumas
Family
Friends
Current events
Personal history
Misunderstandings
Spiritual stuff
Weather (yes, I'm serious)
Endless lists to read and consider

When husbands and wives don't stop to consider these things, they leave them unattended. It becomes so easy to allow all of these externals to change the core of a marriage. If one or both partners does not pay attention to how these variables are changing them, problems can follow.

So here is a chance to self-diagnose. Do any of these variables make your blood pressure rise? Have you dealt with them, or are they still laying underneath the surface, coming out at the worst possible moments? Do you any of these cause you to be a lesser version of who you want to be?

If you feel like some of these issues are affecting your marriage, take some time to deal with it on a personal level. If you need another perspective, ask your spouse for their opinion, but don't ask a question that you don't want the answer to. Otherwise, here are some resources you might consider...

"Total Money Makeover" by Dave Ramsey - a great book to help you deal with financial questions and issues in your life.
"A Love that Multiplies" by Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar - a book on the importance of love in the family with great tips on parenting
"Men are Like Waffles, Women are Like Spaghetti" by Bill and Pam Farrel - you just need to read it.
"The Christian Atheist" by Craig Groeschel - awesome book on dealing with issues of faith and how to live it out in the face of difficulty

All of these books can be found at www.amazon.com in book or digital form.

Happy Valentine's Day!!

Stronger Marriage Day #20 - Public credit

2012-02-13T16:05:00.000-06:00

We are in the age of martyrdom. People use whatever circle they in at the moment to gripe about some other circle, like their family. People gather around the water cooler (do they still have those?) at work to trash their families. I contend they don't usually have that much to gripe about, but they want to fit in. Being upset and ticked off is kind of fashionable today. But is it productive?

Why not use the forum of other people to brag about your spouse, even if they won't? Your spouse does not have to hear it, but I am convinced they will feel it. Talk about something special your spouse did for you. Talk about how blessed you are. Instead of complaining, why not give credit to where credit is due. And if you spouse is around, take full advantage and gush over how awesome they are. Why not build a public bridge of affection instead of secretly destroying your relationship?

Stronger Marriage Day #19 - Please and thank you

2012-02-13T16:01:00.001-06:00

We do our best to be polite (at least I hope you do) to people all around us. We teach our children to be polite by saying, "please" and "thank you." We thank the kid who bags our groceries. We say "thank you" to the ticket taker at the movies. We say "please" to the server when we want more to drink. We try to use our best manners to people all around us (if this seems foreign to you then this would be a good place to just stop reading, because you definitely will not get the rest).

But what about our spouse? Do we ever take for granted the things they do as part of the family? Do we make assumptions about their feelings but not showing politeness to them? Try going out of your way today to say "thank you" and "please" when applicable. Your spouse will appreciate it.

Stronger Marriage Day #18 - Smile

2012-02-13T15:53:00.000-06:00

Have you ever caught someone looking at you, even if it was just a passing glance, and all you could see was the appearance of a complete frown on their face? Maybe it was just a moment or two, but you found yourself wondering what you did to make them give you such a dirty look. In reality, they probably weren't trying to give you a bad day, but that is effect of other people on us. And that is someone you don't even know or care about.

Now what do you suppose the effect of that same look is when coming from your partner? We don't stop to think about it, because hopefully we are with someone that will allow us to be ourselves. But what if being yourself all of the time sends a signal of misery to your spouse?

Try smiling today. Make a conscious effort when you see your spouse to smile at them. Don't do some stupid, fake, cheesy smile. But why not send them the signal that seeing them has caused you to smile? What if that one act of being pleasant gives him/her the encouragement he/she needs to get through the day? Would it be worth it?

Stronger Marriage Day #17 - Intimacy

2012-02-10T14:25:00.002-06:00

One of the most fulfilling aspects of marriage can also be one of the most frustrating. Our culture has often told couples that sex does not need to be talked about. It just happens. The Hollywood model has fed into this with the idea that if you have to talk about it, then sexuality is a lost cause. Unfortunately, many people have religious background that suggests their is a certain shame when couples talk about sexuality.

The Bible is not only open about sexuality, it promotes a healthy sex life within the confines of marriage. Studies are also constantly being done which show the most fulfilled people in the area of intimacy are those who have devoted time to a single partner of the span of decades. In other words, God's plan works when we give it a chance.

Rather than seeking the counsel of entertainment or talk shows, please allow me to recommend some books which will give a Biblical view of sexuality within a marriage and will also not blush away from tough questions.

"Sheet Music" by Kevin Leman
"Intended for Pleasure" by Ed Wheat
"The Act of Marriage" by Tim LaHaye (yes, the co-author of "Left Behind")

These books are written by Godly men from a Biblical perspective. They are open and honest about issues. They disagree with each other about a couple of things, but for the most part they are all on the same track. You can either purchase these books from www.amazon.com in printed or electronic form, or you can buy them at area bookstores.

Stronger Marriage Day #16 - Fun fights

2012-02-09T16:51:00.003-06:00

Some couples do not have fun any more. They have no sense of goofiness. How about picking a fight to break up the chaos? Here are some quick suggestions...

While doing dishes, spray your partner with water and prepare to be soaked.
If it snows, try tossing a snowball in your spouse's direction and pray they fire back.
While your spouse is reading, trying disrupting their reading by smacking their book/newspaper.
Wrestle.
Tie your spouse's sleeves in a knot while they are getting dressed.
Mix up your spouse's socks.
Take a drink from your spouse's glass while they are watching.
Turn off the TV out of nowhere.

Quick sidenote - these suggestions must be timed well and done in a flirty manner. Don't do them in a mean or ill-timed manner. Have fun. Make your intentions clear. Break up the monotony.

Stronger Marriage Day #15 - xxxchurch.com

2012-02-08T18:56:00.000-06:00

With the rising number of couples admitting that pornography has gained a foothold in their marriage, either by way of printed material, internet surfing, or multimedia, it is sometimes a good idea to bring in a resource to help deal with the subject in a healthy and productive way.

I strongly recommend www.xxxchurch.com as a resource for couples in dealing with the dangers and problems linked with pornography. The site has tools for men, women, kids, and ministries. It will address the issue very openly and honesty, so the squeemish need not go. But those brave souls who want to have some freedom in the area can go to the site and get some great tools. They also have some quality software to put on your computer for accountability purposes.

Even if you do not think there is an issue you need to deal with right now, I would recommend checking out the site anyway just to be familiar with it.

Stronger Marriage Day #14 - Just in case

2012-02-07T11:22:00.000-06:00

The future is not something we always want to talk about, especially when it concerns subjects like death, disaster, etc. Some couples never talk about their wants and expectations should something tragic happen, such as sudden deaths or life altering accidents. Younger couples seldom face this reality in a way that makes this hit home, and if it does happen to younger couples, they find themselves confused and not having enough information to make good decisions. Some of these situations can include...

The sudden passing of one partner
Extended hospitalization
Decisions concerning life support

Every couple should take time to sit down and discuss these issues and make plans for the future. The topics can be uncomfortable, but the situations can be even more disturbing when one partner has to make decisions without having a reference point. Here are some questions and decisions you can sit down as a couple and deal with. The conversation may not take very long, but it is worth the effort.

If one of us should be placed on life support and the situation is grim, how do we want it handled?
In the event our kids need someone to watch over them and we are not able, who do we want to be custodians of their future?
Who will handle our affairs in the event of our deaths?
How do we feel about extraordinary actions being taken in the event of medical calamity?
What plans do we need to make concerning funeral arrangements?

These are questions which will help couples talk about the future in a way that each partner can get more information. After discussing these issues, couples can begin to handle wills, trusts, living wills, and power of attorney. Legal steps can be taken with the assistance of an attorney, or you can go to www.legalzoom.com for a more affordable approach.

Stronger Marriage Day #13 - Game time

2012-02-06T16:55:00.000-06:00

Tight budget? Looking for fun? How about a game night? Board games a fairly cheap to buy. A deck of cards is even cheaper. Why not sit at the kitchen table and play a game of Monopoly or Clue? How about a friendly game of Uno or Spades? A little competition never hurt anyone, and it might give you a chance to create some fun memories and be able to talk freely. Pop some popcorn, put the kids to bed, and enjoy the evening!

Stronger Marriage Day #12 - Noises off!

2012-02-06T16:46:00.000-06:00

There is a phrase sometimes used with stage presentations called, "Noises Off!" It is a cue to everyone offstage that it is time to be quiet so the main event of the stage presentation can take place. Even the slightest noise can distract the presenters, actors, speakers, etc.

Try to have a "Noises Off" time with your spouse. Turn off the TV, turn of the music, and turn off the cell phones. Take time to just be together and chat. If it is uncomfortable at first, then there is your sign that you needed to do this sooner. "Noises off!"

Stronger Marriage Day #11 - Marriage Encounter

2012-02-04T13:48:00.000-06:00

Have you considered taking an entire weekend to focus on yourmarriage? Not a weekend filled with activities that do nothing tostrengthen your relationship, but a weekend constructed for the sole purpose ofevaluating and strengthening your bond as husband and wife. We advertisethis a bunch in our church, but a Marriage Encounter weekend is the perfect wayfor a couple to renew their commitment to each other and receive tools thatwill build up the marriage.

The next ME weekend in our area is March 30 - April 1 (Fridaythrough Sunday). If you would like to go, just see me or my wifeChristie ASAP so we can get you registered. If you are not in the Wichitaarea but would like to go to a Marriage Encounter, go to www.agme.org to find a Marriage Encounter near you orto find more information. Everyone deserves a Marriage Encounter!!

Stronger Marriage Day #10 - Progressive Cheap Dinner

2012-02-03T10:45:00.000-06:00

If you are tight on funds but would like to try something dinner, do a progressive dinner on the cheap. Map out the courses for your dinner, and then go to fast food restaurants to do them. So, for salad, go to McDonald's, or something like that. You could also do soup, main courses, dessert, and coffee. The food may not be the best, but it gives you something to talk about as you go place to place. And, if you pick the right area, you may be able to walk from place to place without using a bunch of gas. You could even try it at the local mall food court. As always, this is something to do that will give you something to talk about. Have fun!

Stronger Marriage Day #9 - Movie Choice Night

2012-02-02T09:45:00.003-06:00

Can't decide what movie to rent? Pick a flick for each other. Go to Redbox, rent from Video on Demand, or go to a video rental store (do they still have those?). Pick a movie you think your spouse would like. Then let your spouse do the same for you. It is kind of fun to see how well you really know each other.

Now suppose your spouse picks something you wouldn't watch unless forced to do so under penalty of death. Unless it is immoral or a blatant abuse of privilege, go with it. You might be surprised. The endgame is to have another point of communication. Enjoy!

Stronger Marriage Day #8 - Song of Solomon

2012-02-01T18:51:00.001-06:00

Many couples do Bible studies from a book written by a marriage expert. How about the two of you popping open Song of Solomon? Take turns reading. No need to discuss. It is pretty clear about what it means. Try reading it together in two or three sittings. It is a book on marriage and intimacy. See what God has to say about it. Enjoy!

Stronger Marriage Day #7 - Oxygen Mask

2012-01-31T11:11:00.001-06:00

If you have ever been on a commercial airplane, you have heard the opening speech about where to find the barf bags, the exits, and the oxygen masks. You may also noticed they have told you that in case there is a drop in cabin pressure, the oxygen masks will fall, and your first job is to put your mask on, and then you can help others. Why? Because if you can't breathe, you will be no good to anyone.

In marriage, we sometimes forget to take care of ourselves. We justify it a million ways, but in the end we get angry that we are hurting or incomplete, and then we blame others. It is important that we take care of ourselves in every aspect, that way we have a better shot at loving our spouse. It is better to be married in a place of strength that to expect others to make us strong. We are blessed by out partner's strengths and positives, but God made us to be complete in Him. Once we are there, we can truly begin to have a stronger marriage.

So, is your oxygen mask on?

Stronger Marriage Day #6 - Record of Right

2012-01-30T15:37:00.000-06:00

1 Corinthians 13 says that love keeps no record of wrongs. How about of record of right? Take some time today to write down 5 things about your spouse that you appreciate, see as a positive, can't live without, etc. If you get stuck in the rut of negative on a regular basis, then you have to teach yourself to see what is right in your spouse. If this is really hard for you, then maybe you should take time to do the same for yourself and realize things are better than you think.

"Do I tell them my list?" Nope. This is for you. We often limit the positive when we are not sure how our partner will receive it. So take some time to make a list, either in your brain or on paper, and then give thanks for it. You married this person for a reason. Why not take time to remember that reason?

Stronger Marriage Day #5 - Together in Worship

2012-01-29T18:01:00.001-06:00

One question - Did you worship together? Some couples go to church but never worship. One of the most powerful things you can have in common is what you believe. A building block of that belief is having something in common that revolves around that belief. Maybe church is a la carte to you or your spouse, but I have seen many marriages blessed by the Lord when the couple takes time to worship the same God together. So, did you worship together?

Stronger Marriage Day #4 - Kids? What kids?

2012-01-28T10:56:00.001-06:00

It is so easy for couples to lose sight of the fact that they are married and not simply co-parenting. The main topic of conversation for married couples will always tend to be about their children. Its natural. But it is not always healthy. Some couples find themselves lost whenever their kids get older. They have nothing to talk about. So why not get into the habit now of communicating about things other than kids? By the way, if you don't have kids right now, you can still use some of the questions below to help ignite healthy conversation.

The next time you two have time to talk, follow this rule: "No child referencing." In other words, talk about anything other than kids, grandkids, etc. Seem hard? Then we are just in time. If you are trying to talk but you feel like you have nothing to talk about, try some of these questions to get going:

"How are you feeling about your job?"
"What do we want to accomplish as a couple?"
"If you could pick one movie to watch, what would it be?"
"If you could have picked any career besides the one you are in, what would it be?"
"What do you want to accomplish for yourself in the next 10 years?"

That should get you started. Have fun!

Stronger Marriage Day #3 - Get cooking!

2012-01-27T17:51:00.001-06:00

Do you like to cook? Do you both like to cook? Cooking a meal together can be a lot of fun, especially if you assign jobs and don't make it about having the perfect dinner. Instead of going out, plan a full meal together, from salad to appetizer to entree to dessert. Try cooking new things so that it is a discovery process for both of you. Simple is good, as long as it is fun. Cooking together is a great way to have a discussion. Enjoy!

Stronger Marriage Day #2 - Sight Seeing

2012-01-26T07:51:00.001-06:00

Many couples get into a rut with their dating. Every date is a variation on the same theme - "Dinner, Movie, Home, Sleep." (This is G-rated folks, Fill in your own blanks.)

One of the reasons for this is we all like to be in a comfort zone. And movies, while there is not a problem with them, don't really encourage communication. They are 2 hours of, "Shhhhhhh!! I am watching a movie." So how about this...

Go sight seeing!! What do I mean? Nearly every community has museums of some kind, monuments, window shopping places, or just really cool stuff to look at. And here is the good news...a lot of them are free or very inexpensive. Here is the better news...even if the locations are less than breath-taking, two people who go with an attitude of fun will find a way to make it a good time. Let's be candid about this. The disastrous places usually cause the most conversation, so even they are not that bad.

Most cities or towns have websites to show their places to visit. Be aware of over-selling, but you might find some hidden treasures. In Wichita, for example, you could go to the Keeper of the Plains (awesome), the Wichita Air Museum (cool, but a lot of walking), Old Town shops, the Delano District, etc. The goal here is about a chance to talk and have fun. These places will help you do that.

For more Wichita places, go to www.wichita.360.com. Have fun!

Stronger Marriage Day #1 - Pray

2012-01-25T09:59:00.001-06:00

Pray for your spouse. Don't pray about your spouse. Pray for them. Ask God to bless him/her. Even if you are in a season of struggling, don't pray with anger or a "change them" attitude. Pray in the mode of asking God to move in the heart of your spouse. This practice will help you to see your spouse as God sees them, and it will open up your heart to hearing God speak into your life about your marriage. Still single and waiting for marriage? Pray for your future spouse. Not planning on going down that road? Pray for other marriages.

Sample prayer: "Father, I ask you to bless _____________ today and give him/her the voice of your Spirit in his/her heart to know you love them and have a plan for their life. Amen."

Best Bond movie

2012-01-19T16:03:00.000-06:00

I have previously listed the best James Bond's by way of who played them. I will now list the best Bond movies. I am not including the original Casino Royale made for TV, or the spoof Casino Royale. Never Say Never Again does not count either simply because I say so. I also need to add that the worst Bond movie is usually better than most action movies. So, from worst to best, here we go...

22) The Man With the Golden Gun - Yawn.
21) A View to a Kill - Christopher Walken makes it better than the other.
20) You Only Live Twice - Too far fetched, even for Bond.
19) Die Another Day - Bad effects in a bad second half of the movie.
18) Moonraker - Bond meets Star Wars meets give me a break.
17) The World is Not Enough - Week second half of the movie kills a promising start.
16) Quantum of Solace - A little too green for me, but decent.
15) For Your Eyes Only - Good plot with moderate action.
14) Octupussy - Great action but bad pacing.
13) The Living Daylights - Written for Moore, but improved by Dalton.
12) Thunderball - Probably the best action saves an average story.
11) Tomorrow Never Dies - Grown on me over time; Brosnan's second best effort.
10) Dr. No - The trendsetter, still worth a watch.
9) Live and Let Die - Great theme song; Moore saves a wandering pace.
8) From Russia With Love - Great villain and Bond films find a groove.
7) Diamonds are Forever - Connery returns to a fun Bond.
6) The Spy Who Loved Me - Gadgets take over, but fun to watch.
5) Goldeneye - Reinvents Bond's style for the movies. Still fun to watch.
4) On Her Majesty's Secret Service - Has a close feel to that of the books.
3) License to Kill - Gritty and good action. Dalton should have had a few more.
2) Casino Royale - Gives the character some heart and a good beginning.
1) Goldfinger - Sets the template for the rest.

So there you go. We can all sleep better at night.

Reinventing the wheel

2012-01-19T15:42:00.001-06:00

More thoughts on vision. I am so close to formulating a written vision/mission. But I am trying to not be too cutesy for the sake of being original. I also don't want to copy someone else, because it will look like I have not thought this through. Such a weird kind of stress.

So, I can get this out. I am seeing a total and complete emphasis on developing families in Christ. From a well-rounded family development night to a total Gospel message given to all ages. In other words, lets equip families to glorify Christ in and apart from church. Sounds focused, but there is a lot in there.

We also need to increase the sense of fellowship in the body. Not church dinners. But the sense of a Christ-bond among believers.

Finally, I think we need to revisit what it means to act in faith in this generation. What does a Christian look like at work? What does a Christian look like at the traffic light? And so on.

So close. So close.

The main thing...

2012-01-13T11:03:00.003-06:00

So in forming an articulated vision this week, I have been slowed down by the time of the year. We are about to have our annual business meeting, so blogging has been nowhere in the forefront of my mind. But that's okay.

I looked over the internet at vision statements given by churches to get some thoughts on phrasing and stuff like that. I made a couple of observations:

The churches that are genuinely thriving in seeing souls won to the Lord (Elevation Church, Lifechurch.tv, etc.) place a huge focus on honoring Christ first, ministering to others second. This seems to follow the "great commandment" pattern, but I found it intriguing in their phrasing.
Churches that emphasize people first, whether by means of outreach or growth or discipleship, don't seem to get off the ground as quick. And please, if you are reading this with great aggravation, don't ask for examples. My brain is fried, and I could not name specifics right now, but suffice it to say this was an observation I had.
"Seeker-sensitive" churches seem to have huge lift, but when they find an end to how people are pleased, they level out and start to drop.

My point would be that sustained vision that honors God exclusively incorporates all the pet projects that are sometimes used to replace God in the final view of church purpose. So, if a church seeks to honor God as its sole proposition, it will, by virtue of honoring God, win the lost, disciple the saints, etc. When a church places emphasis on the others first, it may honor God, but people may become the idol.

I don't think this is intentional, but in our desire to grow our churches, we should be careful that we have the right reason, which is that Jesus be glorified in our midst. I read a quote from Tony Dungy today that I think is a perfect fit here:

"God calls us to be available and faithful to His ways and His word. The results are up to Him."

The best Bond...

2012-01-05T10:45:00.000-06:00

On a lighter note, I have been enjoying 25 Days of Bond on Epix. This leads to some questions I will seek to answer. The first one being, who is the best Bond?

Not easy to answer, but I would suggest Daniel Craig. He brings in the right combination of charm, toughness, and attitude. Connery may be the best, but he was not really a spy so much as the toughest guy on the planet. Dalton was closer to what the novels projected, but not a big hit with the fans. Moore was a fun Bond, but he always came across as a little bit of a spoof of himself. Brosnan was the victim of mediocre movies (specifically the last two he did). Lazenby is hard to judge because of one film, but the movie is carried more by the Savalas and Rigg than Bond. So, in order of my preference, here you go...

Daniel Craig
Sean Connery
Timothy Dalton
Pierce Brosnan
Roger Moore
George Lazenby

This will make my best Bond movie list even more confusing, I know, but who said Bond was simple!

More thoughts on vision...

2012-01-05T10:35:00.000-06:00

Read some more on vision. Pretty funny. One article said that mission must be clear before vision is expressed. Another article said that mission is better defined by vision. One article went so far as to say that mission is irrelevent, but vision is everything.

In constructing an articulated view of vision, some articles suggested the statement must be catchy and easy to remember. Many mega-church pastors are very sold on preaching vision as many as four times per year. I am intrigued by this premise. It sounds little like going to an Amway convention so you can be told how important Amway is. Well, if you are there, haven't you agreed with the importance at least in part?

Anyway, I am seeing a clearer picture than I ever have of God's leading for the church. Don't have cool catchphrases yet or any kind of aliteration, but I am seeing the direction of full family ministry, specifically towards kids. We have been pretty sporadic in our attack of the area, but I think we can bump it to a new level if we try. I don't have full details, but I thinking...

Tutoring for kids
Teaching life skills to kids
Parenting classes for the unchurched
Career seeking help for teens
Drug education classes

The rub here is to make sure we are not just doing public service stuff without the gospel, which is a waste of time to me that yields no actual fruit. We need to push this as a way to get the gospel in the door.

What is vision?

2012-01-03T14:19:00.000-06:00

(For the purposes of these blogs, I am not going to cite scripture directly. Not because I don't think scripture is important, but these are more about me thinking outloud than they are trying to present a Biblical argument to the readers. Please file all complaints with blogspot.com and I will be appropriately repremanded.)

Vision is a word that gets used a bunch today, especially in church leadership circles. I fear it is sometimes used from a corporate standpoint rather than Biblical. In other words, we take business models, apply them to the church, and use scripture to back it up.

Vision in the Bible seems to be about definitively hearing the voice of God to go in one direction. A business model would seem to make vision about a catchy phrase that people will remember and latch on to. Nothing wrong with this, but let's not interchange the meanings in the name of keeping the word in place. Vision for the church, then, needs to be God directing the leader in the direction the church needs to go, for better or worse.

This confusion may be what has stumped me in the past and still stumps some leaders today. We have put out these vision statements, preached on them, gotten the church excited, but then not gone anywhere. It is like announcing to the church, "That way right there? That is the way to go. Cheer!!!" But by Old Testament measurements of faith and obedience, vision from God is the launchpoint for where to go.

So, a vision for the church, is a declaration of God's direction for the church and/or leaders and/or congregation, but it is a complete waste without some kind of expressed path on how to get there. The vision that God gives a church takes the church as it is meant to be to where it needs to go.

Vision...

2012-01-02T15:53:00.002-06:00

Sitting in my office today, I asked a couple of questions of myself. The first one was this, "What has God called me to do in Mulvane?" Second, I asked, "What do I need to do to put myself in the best possible position to accomplish that task?"

I have spent the better part of the day mulling over these two questions. This blog will not only chronicle my sporadically weird thoughts about life, but I hope to also trace the journey from vision-hunger to vision-expression to vision-fulfillment.

I think one of the bigger issues we face in the church world today is what I call "007 ministry," where we keep some things private and secret for fear of exposure. Well, I have elected to be out in the open with the process.

Not gonna advertise, but why hide what is going on in my head. So, here we go...

Leverage

2012-01-01T21:34:00.001-06:00

Thank the Lord that Leverage is not in reruns. One of the few good shows on TV, and it continually makes me laugh and not feel guilty for watching it. Just thought you should know.

Try not to drool...

2011-12-29T11:31:00.000-06:00

My wife got me the coolest Christmas present ever. First, she got me the Back to the Future trilogy on BluRay with accompanying digital copies. Second, she got me the entire Star Wars saga on BluRay. I have gotten through Phantom Menace already, and I am now getting through Attack of the Clones.

Tom is happy. Yes. Tom is happy.

Credit where due...

2011-12-28T10:07:00.001-06:00

The repair guy just left, and we have internet. Don't know what to do with the rest of my day now.

Waiting for...what?

2011-12-28T09:34:00.000-06:00

I find myself working from home today. We had a "faster" internet installed yesterday, but the modem they gave us does not work. I find a certain irony to that. Anyway, the appointment was scheduled from 8:00 a.m. to Noon. By the way, for those of you counting at home, that usually means some time right after Noon, probably like 12:15. That is usually about the time my patience has been killed, and I start to wonder if the repairman was raptured and I missed the whole thing.

I wonder how much of our time is spent waiting for things to happen. I find myself of being guilty of not simply enjoying the moment I am in, but rather waiting for the moments to come. Anticipation is so much better than experience at times. We build up the future rather than enjoying the present. Sadly, the present is one big gulp of air away from being so amazing.

For examply, my kids are really a blast to watch. I have twin 5 year olds, a 2 and a half year old, and a nearly three month old. The twins are a boy and a girl, and the younger ones are boys. Yes, that is three boys, and yet we are still dominated by the women in the house. That is another story. I catch myself wondering what their future will be. How will they be in school? Will they be athletes? Will they be musicians? Will they be able to pay for my retirement?

In watching my children, I can get easily lost in the future, that I ignore what is in front of me. Today, they are awesome kids with so much personality that I laugh just listening to them. Their versions of Christmas carols are worth consideration for recording and being sold on Amazon. If I focus to much on waiting for the future, I will miss the treasure of today.

Having said all of that, I am still waiting for the repair guy, and I can slowly feel my blood pressure rise with every passing second. Tick, tock, tick, tock.